Bangers and Cash
Stand Up And Deliver
Rating: 
What has giant dark glasses, four chromium wheels, a booming V8 engine and goes, ‘ey-eee, ey-eee, ey… ey-eeeee’?
Answer: Roy Orbison in his white Excalibur Roadster. The Big ‘O’, who had hits with a string of classics such as Oh Pretty Woman, It’s Over, In Dreams and Crying, bought the supercar convertible in 1970 to go cruising around Vegas.
Elvis Presley sometimes rode in the passenger seat, in matching white leather and rhinestones. You can keep your Ferraris and Lamborghinis . . . I just want a car that growls ‘uh-huh-huh!’ with every gear change. And this one was for sale, as Bangers And Cash (Yesterday channel) returned.
The Excalibur, with a body based on pre-war designs by Ferdinand Porsche and a Chevy engine, may be the coolest vehicle since Ben- Hur’s chariot. Ronald Reagan and Liberace both owned one.
Sarah, Derek, Dave and Paul pictured above. Bangers And Cash is bliss for car-lovers like me who simply enjoy mooning over the models we loved in our youth, writes Christopher Stevens
Vintage car dealer Derek Mathewson, in Thornton-le-Dale, on the edge of the Yorkshire Moors, was smitten. ‘It’s a cracking looking old bus,’ he said.
His customers yearned for it: ‘If I had the money, that’d go home with me,’ sighed one.
At 12 miles per gallon, you’d need money . . . or a mortgage. Roy’s last chart hit, in 1992, was I Drove All Night — and if he did that, he’d have to sell his gold discs for fuel.
Bangers And Cash is bliss for car-lovers like me who simply enjoy mooning over the models we loved in our youth. That might be the first car we owned (a gleaming Triumph Herald attracted much attention at one of Derek’s auctions) or something unattainable that shimmered on a poster from a bedroom wall.
Buyers crowded to an Austin Seven, rebuilt around the rusted remains of a 1935 original — though Derek happily condemned it as ‘the worst car on the road ever produced’.
Mechanic Andrew, who spent hundreds of hours restoring the car, agreed that it was practically undriveable: ‘I don’t particularly like them. They don’t go very fast, they don’t stop very well and they don’t steer.’ He could barely get the engine to start.
Vintage car dealer Derek Mathewson pictured in Bangers and Cash. The Excalibur, with a body based on pre-war designs by Ferdinand Porsche and a Chevy engine, may be the coolest vehicle since Ben- Hur’s chariot, writes Christopher Stevens
None of this prevented an enthusiast from paying £12,500 . . . a hundred times more than the £125 that it cost in the Thirties.
You’d have to be barking. Dexter the Parson Russell terrier was, in his motorcycle sidecar. Devoted owners Roger and Sue spent seven grand on a custom-built double sidecar for their Triumph Thunderbird bike, so that Dexter could ride on the seat as they buzzed down the lanes.
Anything you want, Dexter — You Got It.
Pop star Shaun Ryder of the Happy Mondays doesn’t have a back catalogue like Roy Orbison’s, but he can lay claim to a fund of rock’n’roll anecdotes.
As he meandered through his memories on stage, doing comedy to raise funds for cancer research in Stand Up And Deliver (C4), he recalled the time he and bandmate Bez flew to New York, after hearing about a new drug called crack.
Pop star Shaun Ryder (right, with Jason Manford) of the Happy Mondays doesn’t have a back catalogue like Roy Orbison’s, but he can lay claim to a fund of rock’n’roll anecdotes
‘The thing about crack,’ he said mistily, ‘it’s f****** more-ish.’ Comedian Zoe Lyons listened from the wings as Shaun got swearier. ‘If they have to bleep that,’ she worried, ‘it’ll sound just like Morse code.’
Though none of the gag-telling celebs was particularly funny, this has been a successful two-parter. Comedy tips from mentors Jason Manford and David Baddiel would be valuable for any beginner, or even a best man planning a wedding speech.
‘You can’t tell a story as an opening gag. It takes too long,’ Baddiel told his apprentice, the Rev Richard Coles.
Channel Four has accidentally hit on a format that can be endlessly recycled. More! More!