Jesy Nelson recalls when she’d starve herself as she shares ‘sad’ post-workout snap

Jesy Nelson has recalled when she would starve herself and thought being ‘skinny would make me happier’ in a candid post.

The musician, 29, who left Little Mix last December for the sake of her mental health, admitted she was left feeling ‘so sad’ when she came across an old post-workout image, which she re-uploaded to Instagram on Wednesday.

Reflecting on her past body image issues, the singer said she ‘mentally bullied myself’ in a bid to please others as she urged her fans to seek their own approval in a powerful self-love message.

The media personality, who has been fat-shamed by vile trolls since the beginning of her career, covered her eyes as she laid on the gym floor in the throwback picture.

Confessing the photo sparked memories of her body confidence struggles, the Woman Like Me hitmaker said: ‘I just saw this picture pop up on my feed and it made me feel so sad. 

‘On the day this picture was taken, I remember going to the gym with my manager and I stood in the mirror and I said, ”God I’m so fat I just want my legs to be like this”.

‘I pulled my skin around to try and create a thigh gap because I genuinely believed that being skinny would make me happier.’

The artist added that even when she slimmed down to a size 8 by ‘starving myself’, she still wasn’t content within herself.

Jesy explained: ‘I mentally bullied myself everyday to try to please other people. It’s taken me 10 years to realise that I’m the only person I need to please. 

‘As humans we find it so easy to pay other people compliments but yet we find it so hard to be kind to ourselves because it’s so much easier to pick ourselves apart than to find the things we love about ourselves.’

The X Factor winner ended her note by encouraging her social media users to be their ‘number one fans’.

She said: ‘So if you’re someone who is feeling like I was, please don’t waste years of you’re life seeking approval from others, seek approval from yourself. Be your number one fan. 

‘You are the one in control of your happiness and you are the only one of you in this world and that’s pretty f***ing powerful!’ (sic)

In September 2019, the Pretty Girls songwriter bravely opened up about her hard experience with cruel online bullies in her BBC documentary Odd One Out, which won the Factual Entertainment Award at the 25th National Television Awards.

The ordeal clouded her perception of success, left her in a ‘deep depression’ and even caused her to attempt suicide.

The media personality previously revealed she wouldn’t eat for four days at a time when trolls mocked her appearance. 

Romford native Jesy told Glamour: ‘I just wanted to be Jesy. I didn’t want to be Jesy the fat one. I wanted people to see me as normal, so I punished myself. I starved myself. 

‘If I did eat, I hated myself, I’d punish myself and make sure I didn’t eat for four days. It was horrible, a vicious circle. I got used to people calling me fat because I was like whatever I’ve seen it so much. 

‘People started going in on what my face looked like with memes and people would chop my head off in group photos and replace it with a monster or ET or a sloth.’

Earlier this month, the filmmaker teased fans with the prospect of launching a solo career as she visited the recording studio with two renowned and former Little Mix producers, Patrick Jordan Patrikios and Sunny.

Jesy confirmed her permanent departure from the girl-group late last year, just weeks after revealing she was taking a temporary hiatus from all work commitments. 

Her emotional statement read: ‘To all my Mixers, the past nine years in Little Mix has been the most incredible time of my life. 

‘We have achieved things I never thought possible. From winning our first Brit Award to our sold out shows at the O2.

‘Making friends and fans all over the world I can’t thank you all enough from the bottom of my heart for making me feel like the luckiest girl in the world. You have always been there to support and encourage me and I will never ever forget it.

‘The truth is recently being in the band has really taken a toll on my mental health. I find the constant pressure of being in a girl group and living up to expectations very hard.

‘There comes a time in life when we need to reinvest in taking care of ourselves rather than focusing on making other people happy, and I feel like now is the time to begin that process. 

‘So after much consideration and with a heavy heart, I’m announcing I’m leaving Little Mix.’

The curly-haired beauty went on to express her gratitude towards her supporters and co-members as she added: ‘I need to spend some time with the people I love, doing things that make me happy. 

‘I’m ready to embark on a new chapter in my life – I’m not sure what it’s going to look like right now, but I hope you’ll still be there to support. 

‘I want to say thank you to everyone involved in our journey. All the hard work and dedication that went into making us a success.

‘To every single fan who came to see us in concert, who listened to our songs and sung their hearts out, sent me messages and supported me along the way I want you to know I love you all so much and I could never have done this without you and I appreciate it endlessly.

‘Most of all I want to say thank you to Jade, Perrie and Leigh-Anne for creating some of the most amazing memories I’ll never forget. I hope that you’ll continue to fulfil all of your dreams and keep on making music that people love. Love Jesy x.’ 

Her former bandmates Perrie Edwards, 27, Leigh-Anne Pinnock, 29, and Jade Thirlwall, 28, are set to release their new track Heartbreak Anthem – marking their first song since Jesy exited. 

For confidential support, call the Samaritans on 116123 or visit a local Samaritans branch. See www.samaritans.org for details.