Justin Bieber says the first year of marriage to Hailey was ‘really tough’

Justin and Hailey Bieber, 24, got their marriage license in September 2018 and hosted an extravagant wedding on September 30, 2019 in South Carolina.

And during his interview with GQ for their May 2021 issue, the pop star revealed that ‘the first year of marriage was really tough.’

The 27-year-old Justice singer said the initial difficulties in their marriage stemmed from ‘trauma’ and ‘just lack of trust.’ 

In the new interview, Justin said that he always felt ‘compelled’ to get married. 

He explained: ‘I just felt like that was my calling. Just to get married and have babies and do that whole thing.’

He later says that in regards to kids, ‘not this second, but we will eventually.’ 

Justin said: ‘The first year of marriage was really tough because there was a lot, going back to the trauma stuff. There was just lack of trust.’

Adding: ‘There was all these things that you don’t want to admit to the person that you’re with, because it’s scary. You don’t want to scare them off by saying, “I’m scared.”‘ 

He admitted during the first year of marriage he was ‘on eggshells,’ but then eventually started to believe, he told the outlet. 

Justin said of their marriage now, two and a half years in: ‘We’re just creating these moments for us as a couple, as a family, that we’re building these memories.’

‘And it’s beautiful that we have that to look forward to. Before, I didn’t have that to look forward to in my life. My home life was unstable. I didn’t have a significant other. I didn’t have someone to love. I didn’t have someone to pour into. But now I have that.’ 

Justin and Hailey met in 2009 after her dad Stephen Baldwin introduced them; They became friends and dated for a short time in early 2016 before they parted ways. 

He went on to date Sofia Richie and briefly reunited with ex girlfriend Selena Gomez.

Justin and Hailey rekindled their romance in May 2018 and got engaged July 7, 2018.

The lovebirds got their marriage license from a New York City courthouse in September 2018. 

They tied the knot in an extravagant wedding in South Carolina on September 30, 2019 at the Montage Palmetto Bluff resort in front of 154 guests that included Kendall and Kylie Jenner. 

Justin previously opened up about his past drug use and feeling like he ‘was dying.’  

He had said during his YouTube documentary Sessions, which aired last year, he relied on drugs as an ‘escape’ from his life in the spotlight.

He admitted that he first tried marijuana when he was just 13, after rocketing to fame as a child when he was discovered on YouTube.

After becoming dependent on weed, Justin began to drink lean – a narcotic substance often called purple drank or sizzurp – as well as taking pills, doing Molly, and trying mushrooms. 

Speaking about his addictions in an episode of his YouTube Premium documentary ‘Justin Bieber: Seasons’, he said: ‘It was just an escape for me. I was young.’

Adding: ‘My experience was in front of cameras and I had a different level of exposure.’

 The Yummy hitmaker made headlines as a teenager for getting into trouble with the law, and says he ‘valued the wrong things’ in life because they were being ‘dangled’ in front of him.

He added: ‘I started valuing the wrong things in this business because there were things dangling in front of me. The truth is, I never had the tools. My parents never gave me those tools to be a good team player.’  

Justin eventually decided to get sober because he was ‘dying’, and said people aren’t aware of how ‘serious’ his addictions were.

He explained: ‘I was, like, dying. People don’t know how serious it got It was legit, crazy scary.

‘I basically said to myself, ‘God, if you are real, you get me through this season of stopping these pills and stuff, and if you do, I’ll do the rest of the work.’ I never did the actual work. I got off the pills but never went to the root of everything so I just circled back around which most people do.’  

Hailey also appeared in the documentary, and whilst she didn’t meet the star until after he was sober, she can understand why he would turn to drugs to make himself ‘feel better’.

She said: ‘I think when you take somebody very, very young and they get horrible, crazy crippling anxiety and it goes undiagnosed and you don’t know what it is you are feeling, you start to self-medicate because it makes you feel better. Just helping not to feel anything.’

During the documentary, the Love Yourself singer’s oxygen chamber in his house was shown.

It helps him with his anxiety – with the singer going through nicotinamide adenine dinucleotide (NAD) IV treatment to help flush toxins out of his body.

Explaining the NAD process, Hailey told cameras: ‘For people who used to have a drug problem, when they get sober, the pleasure centers of their brain don’t work the same. So what NAD does is actually helps to repair that part of that brain and it helps repair the pleasure centers to balance them back out.’

Justin was arrested on January 23, 2014 in Miami after he was caught drag racing; he was arrested for driving under the suspicion of a DUI, with an expired license and resisting arrest without violence. 

On the seven year anniversary of his arrest (January 23, 2021), Justin commemorated the day with a touching post on his Instagram: 7 years ago today I was arrested, not my finest hour. Not proud of where I was at in my life. I was hurting, unhappy, confused, angry, mislead, misunderstood and angry at god..’

He continued: ‘I also wore too much leather for someone in Miami. All this to say God has brought me a long way. From then til now I do realize something.. God was as close to me then as he is right now. My encouragement to you is to let your past be a reminder of how far god has brought you. Don’t allow shame to ruin your “today” let the forgiveness of Jesus take over and watch your life blossom into all that God has designed you to be. LOVE YOU GUYS WITH MY WHOLE HEART.’ 

Justin spoke to GQ on his faith and how it helped during his struggles: ‘He is grace. I came to a place where I just was like, “God, if you’re real, I need you to help me, because I can’t do this on my own. Like, I’m struggling so hard. Ever decision I make is out of my own selfish ego.’

Adding: ‘So I’m just like, “What is it that you want from me? You put all these desires in my heart for me to sing and perform and to make music – where are these coming from? Why is this in my heart? What’s the point? What is the point of everything? What is the point of me being on this planet?”‘