Kara Keough Bosworth is reflecting on life and loss in a new Instagram post marking the anniversary of son McCoy’s death as well as the arrival of son Vaughn.
Bosworth, 32, lost McCoy at just six-days-old on April 12th, 2020 and welcomed son Vaughn less than a year later on March 30th, 2021.
Offering a raw look at joy and grief, Kara posted side-by-side photos of Vaughn’s arrival and the ‘last time’ her and husband Kyle Bosworth held McCoy one-year ago.
‘That journey from our darkest day to the brightest hasn’t been easy. But we kept going,’ Kara explained in a heart-wrenching caption.
Emotions: Kara Keough Bosworth reflected on a year full of loss and life while marking one year since the death of infant son McCoy while also celebrating several weeks since the birth of son Vaughn, born March 30th 2021
‘Last year on April 12th, we held McCoy for the last time,’ Bosworth, the daughter of Real Housewives Of Orange County’s Jeana Keough, said.
McCoy passed away after complications during birth caused severe brain damage. His official cause of death was from ‘shoulder dystocia and a compressed umbilical cord.’
Kara said she was ‘haunt[ed]’ by the final moments she shared with her infant, telling followers: ‘Remembering those moments will haunt me forever. Feeling robbed and grateful today as I also remember the moment Vaughn landed on my chest.’
‘Not sure I’ve ever experienced happiness like that,’ she said of her newborn’s arrival. ‘That journey from our darkest day to the brightest hasn’t been easy. But we kept going.’
The space between the highs and the lows was ‘unimaginable’ for Kara, who remembered: ‘When people would say, “I can’t imagine what you’re going through,” I tried to ignore that I’m living the unimaginable, and instead I focused on the fact that I’m “going” through it.’
Tragedy: The daughter of RHOC original Jeana Keough lost son McCoy six days after delivering him via home birth in 2020
‘It isn’t stagnant. It’s movement. We’re headed in a direction. So we kept going. And when people would ask, “How are you doing?” I’d reply, “I’m doing.” Because sometimes, that’s enough. In my case, that was everything.
She told followers – many who are also ‘loss moms’, a term for mothers of deceased young ones – some guidance she’d gotten, saying: ‘When I’d get frenzied in my grief, my doula @4thtrimesterfitnessmethod would remind me to just do the next thing.
And Kara’s ‘next thing’ turned out to be her newborn son.
‘I’m so glad the “next thing” was you, Vaughn Mack. You’re not the next best thing; you’re the best next thing. You’re not a replacement; you’re an extension. Thank you for making this April 12th so much better than the last, sweet boy.’
Then she quoted the bible verse Isaiah 66:9, writing: ‘I Will Not Cause Pain Without Allowing Something New to be Born,’ says the Lord.’
Rebirth: Bosworth actually announced she was having a third child via an Easter Sunday Instagram celebrating both ‘new life’ and ‘sacrifice’
Bosworth announced son Vaughn’s arrival on Saturday.
Alongside a photo album of baby Vaughn she wrote a touching caption about the turbulent year she has just experienced.
‘The day McCoy was born, I started writing a story. Our story. I don’t typically like to spoil the ending, but in this case the ending is a new beginning,’ she wrote.
Kara, who has a five-year-old daughter called Decker, announced: ‘Introducing Decker and McCoy’s baby brother: Vaughn Mack Bosworth.’
She added: ‘Measuring at 20.5 inches and weighing 7 pounds 6 ounces of heaven-sent sweetness. Born on 3.31.21 in Room 11, 6 days before what should have been his big brother’s 1st birthday. His name means “small/little” and “hope.”‘
Spring: Kara’s snaps showed daughter Decker crouching next to three Easter baskets – one for her, one for McCoy and one without a name – in front of a garden stake with said: ‘McCoy’s a big brother! Sprouting this spring!’
Kara noted: ‘It’s not lost on us that if we hadn’t lost Mack, we’d never know Vaughn. And yet, here he is, an unexpected serendipity. A little hope.’
Bosworth actually announced she was having a third child via an Easter Sunday Instagram celebrating both ‘new life’ and ‘sacrifice.’
Only a week later did she reveal that she had in fact given birth four days before Easter on Wednesday, March 31.
Kara’s snaps showed daughter Decker crouching next to three Easter baskets – one for her, one for McCoy and one without a name – in front of a garden stake with said: ‘McCoy’s a big brother! Sprouting this spring!’
Kara tragically lost son McCoy six days after delivering him via home birth in April 2020.
‘For Christians, for Jews, and for me, this time is a reminder of the death of firstborn sons. Sacrifice. Suffering. Mourning. Grief.
New life: ‘For Christians, for Jews, and for me, this time is a reminder of the death of firstborn sons. Sacrifice. Suffering. Mourning. Grief’
‘Why is this night different than other nights? Last Easter was the worst night of my life. We held our firstborn son in our arms as he took his final breaths. We spent time in the hell that is watching your child die.
‘This Easter is decidedly better. Despite that wretched Easter night, I can’t ignore that this day also represents rebirth. Renewed hope.
‘It is said that the word “Easter” is derived from the goddess Eostre. Eostre, the goddess of fertility, symbolizes the birth of new life and the dawn of spring.
‘And so it is for us. New life, the dawn of something beautiful and restorative. Quite literally rising from the ground.
‘We miss you, Mack-a-doodle. Thank you for sending us this sacred gift. You’re a big brother! Tell Grandpa that I said he was right. He’ll know what I mean.’
Hopeful: The family lost McCoy on account of childbirth complications, with the baby passing days after his birth from ‘shoulder dystocia and a compressed umbilical cord’
The basket that represents her soon-to-be new addition featured a rainbow on it, as she alluded to the child being their ‘rainbow baby,’ — a term for a child born to a family that has previously lost a child due to miscarriage, stillbirth or death during infancy.
Since the loss she has continued to keep his memory alive by way of photos and a garden in their backyard named after him called ‘McCoy Casey’s Garden of Life.’
She also got a tattoo of an ‘M’ on her arm with his ashes in the ink. ‘He can stay forever in my arms this way, in the place he last rested,’ she wrote one month after his passing.
After the loss, she and her husband joined a support group for bereaved parents, and additionally she penned a touching essay for Good Morning America about what it means to lose a child.
Memory: She also got a tattoo of an ‘M’ on her arm with his ashes in the ink. ‘He can stay forever in my arms this way, in the place he last rested,’ she wrote one month after his passing
‘We blame ourselves, not because we did anything to harm our children, but because we’re their mothers, and protecting them is our most sacred duty,’ she wrote, adding at the time that her grief fluctuates daily.
Speaking of the support she received from her bereavement group she shared that she felt lucky to have others who understood her pain.
‘Every day, every minute, another mother joins us in this club. It’s a club no one wants to be a part of, but the love and compassion within it are unlike any other. The instant bond that ignites between two women when we sit together in this pain is almost spiritual.’